Sophistry
By Jonathan Marc ShermanXavier (or, Ex), a college boy in a band, starts out the play as a likeable fellow, a young man with passion and conviction. But soon, he begins a downward spiral in the eyes of the viewer. In the first monologue, he speaks to the president of the college about the university's decision to dismiss his favorite philosophy teacher, Whitey McCoy, based on an accusation of sexual misconduct from a "frequent flyer" (acid junkie) named Jack Kahn. He attacks Quintana, the university president, then threatens to his own suit against the school - and against her.
EX:
You're killing this place. Ever since you took over, you've had this conservative plan. Whitey's an aberration. He doesn't fit in with your plan. He's a homosexual. He's an alcoholic. Too bad he's not Jewish and black and crippled as well. You'd really have a field day, then. "So what if he's a tenured professor who's given almost twenty years of his life to this place? So what? He's a 'bad apple'." A healthy society deals with problems. It doesn't toss them away and shut the door. God forbid. It doesn't toss them away and shut the door. God forbid Whitey did what this kid says he did. If so, he's got serious problems and needs help. And treatment. He's given a big chunk of his life to this school, and he should not be bullied, and then ejected as if he were sitting in James Bond's car.
Your blinds are drawn. That's interesting. Because, you know, the blinds have been drawn, the door has been shut, and only you and I have been inside your office. I could walk out of here - you know, I could unzip my pants and run out of here, and I could accuse you of trying to molest me. After all, who's to say you didn't? Am I right? It would be your word against mine. Word Versus Word. Meryl Streep and Dustin Hoffman can portray us in Word Versus Word. Could make a good flick. A student against a figure-in-power. Sound familiar?
In this second monologue, Ex begs forgiveness from his ex-girlfriend Robin, who, though he has cheated on her, hurt her, and acted like an asshole, he still believes will accept his marriage proposal. It is a sad testament of the lies we tell ourselves.
EX:
I was wondering... if you would like... to get married. (Beat.) To me. You know, 'Holy matrimony, Batman!' I mean, Robin. (Beat.) I'm proposing... to you. As tradition dictates, I am on my knees. (Beat.) Like George Washington never actually said, I cannot tell a lie. I do not come bearing an engagement ring... In lieu of such... However... Please accept this shirt. As a symbol. Of my desire. To be committed to you. For the rest of... my life. (Beat.) It's only a symbol. You can't actually keep it. It's Willy's shirt. See the ring-around-the-collar, that's engagement ring around the collar. (Beat.) If you choose to accept my aforementioned offer, of course, you can redeem the shirt for a sizable engagement ring, to be followed by a wedding band.
So? I did a few shots of Jack Daniels before I came over... so I wouldn't smell like mouthwash... I may have had a drink or two, but I am in complete control of my faculties and what's more, I want you to be my betrothed. What do you say, huh?
I had this flash. I feel so alone most of the time - you know, all these gaps everywhere - everything's all broken-up - you and me, my band, pretty soon school will be over and what's left? More of the same? Right? I admit it. I've been stupid.
Forgive me. For all the bad things I've ever done. Love me again, like you used to. Love me like that. Save me from this parade of meaningless encounters. I'm just going through the motions, Robin. But you and I - we were great together. At our peak. We were something to see...
This monologue brought to you by The Monologue Database.