Stefani Speaks

From Lucky Duck By Chelsea Terris

Scene 7 of Lucky Duck, in which Stefani is fresh from a charged moment with Nick, her brother-in-law, with whom she has been in love her whole life.
STEFANI

This play isn't all about him. He'd probably be angry if he knew I had this scene. I'm like a child, stealing a scene from him, from a dying person. It's sick, I know it is.

When someone might die, people say things. And the dying, or maybe-dying person, doesn't hear all of it. But truth is everywhere.

We were kids together. What does that mean? People are children together and then adults, not together. What brings one to another? A shared classroom, same favorite color. (Laughs a little.) He was funny. Is funny. Was funny.

I have a husband. What does a husband mean? One day I woke up and I had Richard. It's about choosing, isn't it? A choice I made. I heard once that time is relative, that God is a pinprick, a little explosion of all time gathered into one, forever. If that's the case then maybe I was Richard's wife when Nickey and I threw chalk at each other. And Nick and I were in love in our prospective wombs. And when Nick... if Nick... goes, then he's already gone, or he's back to my 16th birthday party, or he's inside. He's inside me.

I was so young, so... furiously young. You know what it's like to be that young, but to know something like that? To be so stupid about so much but to know that he's it, he's the love of your life, and you make something together, because you're dying to create, you're hungry to make out and make it and make make make!

After, I was so sad. He knew. He knew when I tried to tell him, but brushed me off. Took an internship at the Paris exchange. He wanted what we both wanted. To be older. For time to stretch like a hammock beneath and sway us into a luckier time. Nothing ever failed him. Time was a ball in his hand.

I see the way he looks at Mikey. I know, because I feel the same. Richard knows. What is it to know that your child, who is yours in blood, is not truly yours? That your wife...? I don't know what I'm saying.

(Lights down as Stefani thinks, then walks off aimlessly.)


This monologue is from Lucky Duck by Chelsea Terris. If you would like to read the entire play, you can purchase an electronic (PDF) copy of the script for $15.00.
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