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Thursday, April 17, 2003 @ 9:56 PM
Adoration and Anger
WARNING: This Entry Contains Feminism.
Somehow it's all connected, everything that happened to me today, and I'm beginning to see the patterns emerging and it makes me do that thing where I suck in air through my teeth, excited.
I had a discussion with Brie today, who's apathetic about gender equity, and she talked about how she's not a feminist because she doesn't feel like she's ever been victimized by patriarchy. She's been shaped, but she doesn't feel like a victim, yet. Maybe she thinks she transcends the system that surrounds and suffocates us all, I don't know. So defensive, so eager to say, "Feminists blame men for everything." Well, I'm a feminist, I was raised a feminist, I will die a feminist, and I believe that we all, men and women, suffer under patriarchy. But I also believe that if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem. I just look at her, and I just look at the rest of the passive women, and the defensive men, and I wonder: What will it take to make you angry? I always think if you're not angry, you're not paying close enough attention. What has to be taken from you before you see what's been there all along? What will it take to make an activist out of you? You can't answer me, I know, but I have to ask anyway.
People act like it's a bad thing to be angry. They don't know the difference between angry and pissed off. One is doing, and one is being. And for a while I was feeling, feeling hopless, feeling helpless. Suddenly, I'm feeling inspired, and I've got to figure out what to do about it.
I saw Alix Olson perform tonight, and I'm in love with what her words awoke in me. And all of a sudden, I want to write the words that wake up my generation. Ambitious, I know, but right now, I want to die trying. Maybe six years from now, I'll want nothing more than to make pie while barefoot and pregnant in a kitchen, I don't know. But right now, I want to cut my hair short and cover my body in bumper-sticker tattoos. And I want to unleash my kindness and rage upon the uncaring world.
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