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Tuesday, July 01, 2003 @ 3:03 PM

Ambition Hurts

I slept last night, it was soooo sweeeeeeet! It was worth it to have to turn away multiple people who wanted to hang out with me. (Why am I so much more popular when I need to be alone?) I slept, and I woke up and felt so sane. It was great.

Auditions are going wonderfully... There's this horrible paradox about auditions, though. You always want a really good turn-out, you want lots of talented people to show up, so that you get the best cast you can possibly get. Of course, the more people show up, the more you have to turn away. The more people you have to call to say, "You did wonderfully. You're obviously talented, and I'm sorry, but I can't use you." Sometimes, I hate the competitive nature of it all. I like to think of theatre as something all-inclusive, something that everyone who's properly motivated should have the chance to be a part of. It's hard to tell myself that theatre is about a loving community when it's survival-of-the-fittest at auditions. It doesn't matter if I tell them not to feel hurt, not to feel rejected, not to feel like they aren't any good. I've never met anyone who doesn't feel bad when they don't get a role.


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