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Wednesday, August 13, 2003 @ 5:41 PM

Thank You, Smashing Pumpkins

...Is it bright where you are?
Have the people changed?
Does it make you happy you're so strange?...

Last night, Dan and I saw Pirates..., which I liked very much in spite of myself. Ah, and Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp are gorgeous. (Justin's mom inspired the phrase "oddballian cinema" to describe Depp's work - feel free to adopt this addage). Then we had Justin, Kat, and Michelle over. Steph came home, and after the guests left, the three of us bought a disposable camera and headed to Maxwell Park for our last night as roommates. We took the pictures way too quickly, and played on the swings and junk until the police came and asked us to leave. I have dozens upon dozens of memories that took place in Maxwell Park, and now I have just a few more.

We all fell asleep in the living room at around three last night, and spent the afternoon packing. We listened to the brand-new "Summer of Trogdor Mix: Parent-free in 2003!" CD I made and played the "remember when?" game. Our silverware drawer contains three unused spoons. Almost every dish in the apartment is in or near the sink, waiting to be washed one last time. Seems more poetic than it probably is in actuality.

Tonight is the end-of-season banquet for the company. We will have awards and talk about what we would like the company to do and be, next. I hate the idea of leaving a brand-new company on hiatus. Partially because the connotative meaning (for me) of "on hiatus" is "dead (for a while?)".

This has been a weird and very difficult summer, for lots of reasons. I don't know if I could have gotten through it if I hadn't known that I'd be leaving in the fall. That has probably made all the difference.

And I'm not sure if I'm supposed to see the end for the beginning, or the beginning for the end. I'll let you know if I figure that out.

...Delivered from the blast
The last of a line of lasts
The pale princess of a palace cracked
And now the kingdom comes
Crashing down undone
And I am a master of a nothing place
Of recoil and grace...


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